athleticism (adj)- Ambiguously describes a player's quickness, leaping ability or endurance. (Chris Henry's athleticism enabled him to leap three backyard fences in the same time it took the cops to get over one.) Suggested alternatives: none, it simply needs to be eradicated from the vocabulary of all commentators. By definition all athletes have some level of athleticism.
double-double (n)-When a basketball player records double digits in two statistical categories. (Boozer earned a double-double in rebounds and blown defensive assignments last night.) Note: This one probably is only repulsive to anyone who has to listen to local Utah Jazz broadcasts. Let’s put it this way, if there were a drinking game that involved Craig Bolerjack and Ron Boone saying “double-double,” prohibition would no longer be an antiquated idea.
length (adj)- Typically refers to the reach of a basketball player. (Dick Vitale's bruised face learned of Josh Smith’s length first hand.) Suggested alternatives: so-and-so has long arms, etc.
props (n)- Proper recognition; often used with the adjective mad. (I give mad props to the people at Hooters for simultaneously ruining hot wings and breasts.) Suggested alternatives: good job, recognize, etc.
Spygate (n)-That thing where the New England Patriots were caught recording an opposing team’s signals. (Man, I’m sick of all this Spygate crap.) Suggested alternatives: deporting whoever first used the damn term.
upside (adj)- Referring to an undeveloped prospect’s potential abilities. (Unfortunately ESPN’s draft analysis shows have unrealized upside.) Suggested alternatives: so-and-so could be really good, etc.
walk-off (adj)-Game winning last play. (He laid down a walk-off royal flush to win the pot.) Suggested alternatives: game-winning, ____ that won the game.
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