Sometimes things don't work out how you'd like them to. Sometimes life gets in the way of things you enjoy. Sometimes you can't post on a little-read blog because you're stuck between two competing crime syndicates. Sometimes you just make stuff up because the truth is somewhat less interesting. This is my dilemma.
(Read part 1 here.)
As previously seen, our dear contributors may have had somewhat of a gambling problem during their absence from the blog. It may have been worse than previously mentioned . . .
March 8, 2010:
Corban: Did you see they've found a secret Giotto?
Josh: No, where?
Corban: Florence.
Josh: It makes you wonder what other secret artwork is out there, huh?
Corban: We're a little gay. Or super manly.
Josh: It takes a real man to want to understand art. [Spits on the floor.]
Corban: The article talks about the "restoration" techniques used in the 1840s. Sounds like it was steel wool and turpentine.
Josh: That's how any restoration work should be done.
By the way, do you want to help me restore this Van Gogh?
Someone seems a little desperate for cash.
Corban: I wish I was on bed rest.
Josh: Don't let her hear that.
Corban: Yeah, it means that I get to do all the cooking and cleaning. And I'm awesome at only one of those things.
Josh: You're really not as good at cleaning as you think.
As things get even more self-doubty (which is totally a word, since I just made it up) . . .
March 9, 2010:
Corban: Is Baseball Weekly still published? To have anything published weekly on the internet seems foolish.
Josh: How about "The Differ Weekly?" Since the internet is largely about knee-jerk responses to up-to-the-second news, and since we aim to be different . . .
Corban: We could always have The Differ Weekly become an infrequent column on the site. Of course, The Differ is already infrequent. So, adding an infrequent section would be the same as not adding a section at all, right?
Josh: It could be similar to the weekly feature on The Onion where on the cover of a made-up magazine they feature a ridiculous headline like: "A List of Celebrities Written Down and Numbered."
Corban:
1. Weird Al
2. Ray Stevens
3. Steve Buscemi
Josh:
1. Steve Martin
2. Robert Goulet
3. Zac Efron
Sorry, I forgot to give you the title of that list: "The Top 3 Celebrities Most Likely to Shout Out Their Name During Sexual Congress."
Corban: I can't see Steve Martin as #1. Top ten for sure, but #1? I think you're confusing Steve Martin with Steve-O.
Josh: No, Steve-O is #1 on the list "Top 10 Celebrities Most Likely to Use a Ceiling Mirror to Remember Their Name."
Corban: "Top 3 Women Who Other Women Think Are Hot but Men Don't:"
1. Kate Hudson
2. Keira Knightley
3. Sandra Bullock
Josh: I think Miss Piggy should be #1, since most women find her hot. And don't say fictional characters can't be included, otherwise why did you include "Kate Hudson?"
This was why nothing was posted for a year and a half, I suppose.
(Part III: Tomorrow)
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